lounging with lovers

I lounge in bed with my lovers. Surrounded by pens, journals, pages typed and notes torn from drawing pads. My phone plugged into a portable speaker- changing music as it suits my mood. I write and edit and swim with my thoughts. Wearing creamy soft striped pajamas- very masculine, but tailored for the feminine- with red silk bra and cheery pattern panties underneath because it is always nice to feel sexy & smart, but even more so when it’s to make an effort for no one other than yourself: to remember you are always worth your power.

I never wear underthings that aren’t beautiful. It is a rebellion, perhaps, against my mom’s line that you should keep “period panties,” meaning having some old, not so nice panties available for the days you bleed. The purpose being that you don’t mess your good things during that shameful period time. I take the opposite tact: you should never wear less than beautiful underthings.

However, during your cycle, you should wear your nicest items. It is a time of rebirth and power. Your body is smashed with hormones and you can either let them bring you down through the patriarchal ideas that a woman’s body is turned against her and weak or you can embrace them … embrace the pain for the life and creative force it’s pushing out. Embrace the blood for its power. Embrace your swollen breasts and belly for all the feminine energy they represent. Never wear less than the best underthings for you- relish in the secret knowledge of the items you bear closest to your most vulnerable, but powerful parts. Envelope your breasts and yoni in the softest, prettiest, and best items you own. If your style be modest athletic or laciest of girly frills, embrace that and know the beauty you deserve. If someone else gets to see your secrets, the luckier for them, but do it for yourself. You deserve to be adorned as the goddess you are.

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